Rating: NC-17 to be safe and not offend anyone.
Disclaimer: Kevin and Scotty are not mine. They should be so grateful for that. :)
The moment his lips touched Kevin’s he knew it was a mistake. Not the kiss, not the lobster either, but the champagne. That lowers barriers that should stay up. There was no way he could stop this now. Well off course there was, Kevin would not do anything against Scotty’s will, so all Scotty had to do was clearly say ‘no’, but Scotty was not willing to give this up.
The lips were so familiar, the touches not new either, slightly disappointing was the desperation that also came with the kisses. The eagerness as Kevin searched for some tenderness in return, pushing himself against Scotty, seeking another human being’s touch, the sad sound of his voice as he whispered Scotty’s name followed by a begging ‘please’ that almost broke Scotty’s heart.
He should stop this. Kevin shouldn’t do this. Not with him. Not with someone else either, for that matter. He should only do this with Jason…. Kevin would hate himself in the morning, he knew that for sure. But he didn’t want it to stop. He did not want the touches and kisses to go away. He did not want to spend another night alone on that air-mattress dreaming of Kevin, a room away and yet totally out of reach.
He had tried to be a good friend. He had listened as Kevin talked about Jason, about their love for each other and although it had cut him deep, he could only be happy for Kevin as he talked to him about ‘his’ Jason, with a light in his eyes.
But this last week he had seen that light fading.
To the outside world Kevin was the same joyful man he always was, laughing, joking, always ready with some cynical remark, a shoulder to cry on, a friend to talk to, a brother to fall back on, a son to hold on to. Above all a man, patiently waiting for his lover to come home. Not once did he make advances on Scotty and Scotty did not expect him to nor encourage him.
But, being in the apartment, Scotty saw the sadness when there was, yet again, no message from Jason on the answering machine. Scotty heard the tears that Kevin cried softly. Scotty knew that Kevin worked later and later at night in the fear that he might miss a call from Malaysia.
Scotty noticed with concern the amounts of alcohol that Kevin poured inside himself to numb the pain. And Scotty was the one, who would wake up in the middle of the night because the alcohol induced nightmares made Kevin call out for Jason to come back, with such pain, that Scotty slowly began to hate Jason, although he didn’t even know the man.
When Kevin had bitterly mentioned that Jason had talked to his brother Robert, twice no less, and had not bothered to contact him, something seemed to break in Kevin. His concern laced with love and apologies for Jason’s behavior had changed in a harder cynical tone. The disappointment was very obvious and Scotty had tried to cheer Kevin up, but somehow Kevin did not want to hear it.
When Kevin had carelessly suggested to light the candles, Scotty had wanted to jump up to create a more romantic atmosphere, immediately realizing that that would not be a good idea. And although he joked it away, Scotty had noticed how easy it had been for them to fall into their own usual patterns.
He thought his time away had been enough to get over Kevin, but when he walked into his office and saw those beloved blue eyes and that surprised smile, heard that warm voice that could still sent shivers down his spine, he was lost. He immediately fell in love again.
It was as if no time had passed between them. Kevin was not angry. Scotty had not for one second considered that Kevin could be in a relationship, but had been happy for Kevin, because Kevin seemed happy. THIS had to stop. NOW. He pulled Kevin’s hair softly, to get his attention.
“Kevin. We shouldn’t…”
“No.” agreed Kevin, but his lips caressed Scotty’s as if retreat was not an option.
“We are on the couch… I should be on the m… mattress.”
And you in your own bed.
“Yes, we should.” No, no, not ‘we’, Scotty wanted to say, but Kevin had other plans and before Scotty was well aware of what was going on, he was on the mattress with Kevin on top of him. His clothes doing some magic disappearing act, not that Scotty was complaining, his brains were too busy trying to keep track of Kevin’s mouth and fingers, while other parts of his body simply enjoyed the sensations.
From the corner of his eye he saw the telephone.
Please, Dear God, let it ring. Let it be Jason. Make Kevin happy. I want to see that light in his eyes again. Even if it is for someone else. I love him so much.
Kevin’s lips left a trail of kisses, moving slowly from Scotty’s lips to his chest. This had to stop. Scotty knew his heart would be broken in the morning once Kevin woke up.
I don’t think I care, if it is the price to pay for one more night with Kevin.
Kevin’s mouth stopped momentarily to give attention to Scotty’s nipples, which is something he shouldn’t do because he is in love with someone else.
Someone who doesn’t care enough to call him.
Scotty moves his body to urge Kevin to go on, but he knows he should push Kevin away.
Kevin will be hurt.
By the time Kevin reaches Scotty’s stomach, Scotty knows Kevin would be hurt once he realizes that he cheated on Jason.
Kevin loves Jason, Jason loves Kevin.
I love Kevin.
His body is in flames. He wants Kevin so badly it hurts. Scotty looks away when Kevin urges him to spread his legs a little further.
The telephone. Please, God, let it ring. Jason. Nora. Kitty. Tommy. Sarah. Anybody!
He can feel Kevin’s lips move lower, from his belly further down. The only sounds breaking the silence are Kevin’s soft kisses and his own voice urging Kevin to go on. The telephone remains deadly quiet as Scotty loses his inner battle.