the random word generator: life
Disclaimer: Brothers & Sisters is not mine, I know. Stop rubbing it in.
The cold water hits him and he’s aware of this. There is a panic for he cannot move, but as he sinks deeper and deeper, the dark water fades and is replaced by a green meadow and he sees himself playing with this dog, he sees his mother smiling at him and encouraging him to have fun. But the fun stops when his mother disappears from view. William feels her loss again as he’s reminded of that autumn morning when he stood by her grave, only 8 years old, crying bitter tears.
His life would not be carefree again, his father drinking way more than is good for him. He hates William, repeatedly telling the boy that he wished William had died and not his mother, William shies away from his father. When his father finally dies, William is 15 years old and he’s on his own. He stands by his father grave, not a single tear. His jaw locked in a stubborn look, he turns his back on the grave, to never return again. Every years he goes to see his mom, but his dad.... never.
He works a lot, dates a bit, until the day that he meets this young girl, Nora Holden. Her smile lights up his life, he loves her, wants to protect her and he watches this sweet innocent girl grow up to become a mother. He remembers being in awe as her belly grows bigger and bigger, carrying their child, his child. Sarah. His first-born. Would he have preferred his first born to be boy? Never!
It is the second child he holds closest to his heart. Kitty. The difference is, he wasn’t there when Sarah, Tommy, Kevin and Justin were born, but he was there when Kitty saw the first light of her life and he can still feel the tears on his face as he sees her the very first time. Not the cleaned up version, after the nurses and doctors had their hands on the baby, like with Sarah, but he saw her come out of Nora. All fragile and breakable.
To him Kitty would always remain fragile and breakable, but extremely resilient. Unlike Tommy, who came into the world angry and always hungry. Always making noise and crying a lot. And then came Kevin. Quiet as a mouse most of the time, until feeding time, then he demanded! The contrast couldn’t be bigger. And he loved all of them, but Kitty the most.
And he buys his first office-space, no longer being able to work from home. And Nora gets less and less involved with Ojai and more with raising their four children and he loves to be a father. He wants to be a good father. He goes camping with them and hunting. His children need to know about survival.
And Sarah and Kitty fight a lot, but can also be two giggling little girls. And Tommy often beats up Kevin, Kevin hardly ever fights back. Nora claims that Kevin is not a fighter, but William is not so sure about that as he watches Kevin go his own way. Not interested in camping, not interested in hunting, not interested in Ojai. Just like Kitty he chooses his own path, away from William. Kevin remains however always close to Nora.
And then Nora came with the message that she was pregnant again. They had said that four was enough, but there comes Justin. The baby of the family, who would be William’s biggest pride and greatest worry. From the start Justin is spoilt by his older sisters, ignored by Tommy, reluctantly accepted by Kevin and babied by Nora and himself.
With a house full of children, Nora is always busy with them and William feels less and less important to her and then, at this party, he meets this blonde, very pretty actress.... Holly. And Holly makes him the centre of her life, whenever he’s with her. Oh, it’s not easy. He feels guilty towards Nora and wants to break with Holly, but when he’s with Holly, she makes him feel so good, so special, that he cannot give that up either.
William doesn’t notice how he gets colder and colder as he slowly sinks deeper and deeper. For it all comes back to him. Sarah’s marriage to Joe, a man William considered a divorced loser, not good enough for Sarah, but Sarah is in love and eventually gives him his first grand-child, a beautiful girl, Paige and later a great boy, Cooper.
Tommy made a better choice, according to William. Julia is pretty and smart and he really approves of her. He doesn’t approve with Kitty’s decision to go to New York. He cannot understand why she won’t stay here, where he can help her. And there’s Justin, losing control over his life in drugs and alcohol, until he decides to go to Afghanistan...
And there’s Kevin... William wants to forget the awful things he said when Kevin stood there, barely 17 years old, white as sheet, admitting that he is gay and William knows it is not possible because, Kevin never forgave him. They moved on, but the past is not forgotten, not even forgiven. Not really.
But in all, when he looks back on his life he can be satisfied. He’s married to a sensational woman he loves. He has one successful daughter, working in the company he built, together with her brother, he has a son who’s a lawyer, a daughter who controls the airwaves (well, at least to him) and he’s convinced that, in time, Justin will do fine as well. A good legacy to leave behind.
His body touches the floor of the swimming pool and all William can see them all. Nora, beautiful as ever. Sarah, with Joe and their two children, Paige and Cooper. He sees Tommy smiling at Julia, lovely couple that they are. He sees Kevin, alone, but not necessarily unhappy and Justin is there too.
He smiles. The cold hits him. His heart finally stops beating. Silence falls. A life is over.