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MY KEVIN/SCOTTY AND OTHER B&S FANFIC
welcome to my fantasies
Fanfic: B&S episode 713: part 3/8  
29th-Apr-2013 12:23 am
quote: get drunk?
Season 7 – Episode 713 – Last dance

By Marea67
About: Brothers & Sisters general
Rate: Can’t go higher than PG-13 as this American Television.
Disclaimer: Just escaping from reality here, not created for financial gain.
Summary: It’s my own season 7. Go with it! If you believe you can do better, write it yourself! I dare you

*****3/8*****

Nora enters the garage, where she finds the boxes that Dennis York had left her. She stares at the all the separate files. She had thoroughly arranged it all. She gone through quite a few of them already, but with Tommy’s death, this had been delegated back to an afterthought.

All around her are files that contain pieces of paper and pictures and receipts and copies of documents long forgotten or maybe not so forgotten…
“Oh, William… Tommy is dead and I’m worried sick about Kevin. Why can’t this family never catch a break? When is ‘enough’ finally enough? I’m sick and tired of this all.”

Her fingers grab the first file she sees and she grabs everything in it.
“I’m done, William! I’m done with trying to figure out who you were. I no longer want to know what was real and what wasn’t! I’m done with the lies and the secrets! Just keep them! And choke on them!”

She screams in frustration and she throws even more content on the floor and finally she empties every file until all is one big pile of paper again, thus undoing countless hours of work. She sinks to her knees amidst the papers and starts to cry until she’s too exhausted.

She gets up and returns to her house, where she takes her phone and dials a number.
“Holly? Hi, it’s Nora.. No, I’m fine… I’m fine… Just…. I was wondering if you have something to do tonight? … No? Would you like to drop by … let you bring the wine….” Nora manages a smile despite the fact that her cheeks are still wet with tears.

*****

“Oh, what?! … Kevin and his annoying brain!” Scotty chops the carrots with such force and speed that it’s clear that he’s putting quite some frustration in it. “I swear that sometimes I could kill him for getting the weirdest ideas in his head!” Bam! He slams closed a drawer that it is his way and Justin winces.

“He’s just afraid to lose you.”
“That’s what I don’t get. He couldn’t lose me if he tried. If there’s one thing that the whole cheating stupidity has taught me, it’s that I know with who I want to spend the rest of my life.”

Justin doesn’t give an answer and Scotty calms down a bit.
“I sometimes wish that Kevin’s brain had an ‘off’-switch.” He mumbles. Justin grins.
“Don’t know how these things work with you guys, but Tyler has some very effective ways to switch of my brains….”

“Eeew, too much info.” Scotty now smiles as well, but then his smile fades again. “If that were the problem and solution, things would be so much easier….”
“When was the last time that you and Kevin actually had some time to yourselves? No work, no kids, no responsibilities…?”

“It’s been a while…” Scotty admits.
“I don’t want to make this sound as criticism, but, you know, you two have been tumbling from one thing into the other. I don’t really believe that you two have had a chance to fully let it sink in that some major changes have happened in your lives…”

“I do feel sometimes that I’m running after the facts, yes.” Scotty has to say.
“Then do something about it…”
“Maybe I should.”
“Well, got to go, Tyler is waiting for me. Bye.” Justin gives Scotty a hug and disappears.

*****

Kevin enters the Julia's room, where Julia sits on her bed.
“They called you back?” She asks. “Now I feel even worse.”
“You had a fight with Michelle?” Kevin clearly doesn’t believe it. Julia rolls her eyes and wraps her arms around her knees.

“I’m so embarrassed right now… I just lost it…. I never knew what that really meant, until now… I mean… I wanted to hurt her, seriously do her some injury, just rip her apart bit by bit and kill her….”
“Trust me. I know how you feel…” Kevin replies sarcastically.

“It’s just,… when you told me who she was, I didn’t believe you at first. I thought you had to be wrong, because I thought she was my friend. I thought we connected. She pretended to have lost a child…. She acted like she knew what it feels like to have lost a child, when she never lost one.”

“It’s not entirely pretending.. She was forced to abort her child when she was teenager. The child was Scotty’s… and when years later she got pregnant again, knowing it was Scotty’s, something went wrong in her head and those two became one child. And she had to give him up.” Kevin explains softly. Julia shakes her head.

“That’s not the same…. I lost my son because he was born too soon and he wasn’t strong enough to survive. He died my in arms! That is not the same as agreeing as to be a surrogate mother, then change your mind and being forced to give back the child you stole to begin with. Daniel is still alive. William isn’t!”

Julia sobs so loud that Kevin considers it more wise to not argue with her over this. He just wraps an arm around her and he lets he cry against his shoulder, until Julia pushes herself away from him.
“I promised I wouldn’t cry anymore…”

“If there’s still so much pain over William…” Kevin starts, but Julia shakes her head.
“Most of the time I can live with it. Today it just hit me hard… I feel so betrayed by Michelle. I thought she understood, that she’d gone through the same pain as I had, I told her things I never told anyone before,… ‘cause I trusted her…

And then I found she was just a liar. She didn’t care about me or William or anything else I told her. She just tried to get information out of me about Daniel… And she did it so cleverly by talking about Elizabeth and Billy…. Very smart… Such a snake…. The things I told her….”

“Did you talk to her about what had happened to you these last one and a half years?”
“Yes. I now I got no one left to trust.”
“Don’t be silly. I’m still here…” Kevin smiles gently and when he sees a painful little look on her face, he nods that he understand her worries.

“Jules….” He starts by sitting a little closer to her. “Ever since I found out that it was my child that you had carried, I haven’t only had special feelings for Elizabeth, but also for you. I know it’s not some love-connection. I know that neither of us would ever act on it, but I feel it changed something between us.We always got along, but when we found out about Elizabeth something changed between us…. That is something that happened with both of us.”

“I know.” Julia is too wrapped up in listening to Kevin to realize that she’s copying the whispering.
“I can’t make you talk, but if you need a friend…. I’m here…” The words are so simple, so sincere and just a confirmation of what Julia had known to be true all along, that her eyes fill tears. She leans in and gives Kevin a small kiss on the lips. She lets her forehead rest against his.

“Would you still be my friend if I was really losing my mind…?” She then asks. “Because that is what is going on… Instead of feeling better I seem to drown even further away. I’m finding it harder and harder to tell reality from fantasy…” She whispers, admitting her secret to him. Kevin says nothing. He just listens and it makes Julia sit up straight again.

“These last few weeks, since Tommy died, I’ve been having … I don’t know what they are. Memories? Nightmares? Illusions? I sometimes think that I remember what happened to me, what it is I’m trying to block out, if there is such a thing, and it’s not just my mind trying to fill up the blanks that are there….”

“Have you spoken to your psychiatrist about this?”
“No. I don’t know if they’re real or not. They are mostly consistent, but sometimes details are different. Sometimes I remember that they touched me, sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I have specific memory of a painting or a picture on the wall, that isn’t there where I dream about it again.”

“This happens in your dreams?”
“Not always. Sometimes it’s like an image that just comes back to me… Like I said, I don’t know if they’re real memories or not, Or if they’re only partially real and my mind creates the rest of it…. It’s driving me crazier than I already am.” She suddenly jokes.

Kevin smiles briefly, but then becomes serious.
“Talk to your psychiatrist about this. Maybe they can do something for you? I’m a lawyer not a shrink, but I can imagine that maybe a different medication might either take away the nightmares or visions, or block them altogether.”

“I’ve been thinking the same, but I’m terrified that they will decide to keep me here forever if I say something. What if I never get out of here?”
“And what if perhaps they can help you and you can get out of here?” Kevin asks in return.

“So you think I should talk? Because Renee said it would be the worst thing I could do …. I mean Michelle of course.”
“And maybe you’ve just answered your own question there. Do you really believe her?…” Kevin answers.

“No.” Julia answers, just as the door opens again and the nurse enters the small room.
“I’m sorry, Mr Walker, but you’ll have to leave.”
“Alright.” Kevin nods.
“I’m glad to see that Julia’s calmer now.” The nurse smile at Julia, who smiles in return.

“Kevin has that effect on me.” She gives Kevin a wink. They both get up from the bed to say goodbye. “Thank you for coming back to see me.” Julia says and she gives him such a tight hug that Kevin is surprised by how strong she is.
“Remember, if you need me, let them call me.” He lets Julia know one more time.

*****

“You killed me? You killed off the wife?” Kitty says, after having quickly looked through the book that Seth had written.
“It’s not about you. Or me. It’s about someone in a situation like ours was and with another outcome than ours, but the feelings are still the same. This guy only ends up suffering the pain of the death of his wife….

I know that you wanted to concentrate on the positive and I see why it is important, but… I was afraid that I would lose you and, I didn’t want to put negative thoughts or my worries on you… and so I put them in the only place where I knew that would serve a purpose…. In my writing…”

“Oh, honey, it is so easy to forget that those who love you, can be so terrified too. I was so busy with staying positive at all cost…. I’m sorry, if I’ve given you the feeling that you can’t be honest with me.” Kitty feels a little deflated. Sure, Seth had been overly protective. And he had done everything possible to make her feel better.

It had never occurred to her to worry about Seth’s emotions. He had always seemed to take her good and bad moments as they came and he had always dealt with them with a maturity that she had not expected from him.
“So you dealt with my sickness by putting my possible death on paper….”

“Now, before you get all angry and upset, will you please read it first?”
“Yes, of course. And, unless there’s some really personal information in there, I won’t refuse the right to publish this… But, thanks, that you first want my input in this… I will read it. Tonight.” Kitty promises.

*****

“Hey. In bed already?” Justin is concerned to see Tyler installed in bed with a couple of books on one side and a bag of sweets on the other. “Are you sick?”
“Not entirely.” Tyler answers. “Just an upset stomach, I thought.”
“You thought…?”

Tyler looks guilty and she nervously plays with her hands.
“Do you remember when you brother died? And everything got so hectic and we up half the night and asleep half the day….?”
“Yes.”

“… I forgot to take the pill. I thought that it didn’t matter, that I was still within the safe zone, but …” She entwines her fingers, not sure how to go on.
“But…?” Tyler can’t figure out if the look on Justin’s face is one of hope or one of distress.
“I wasn’t?” She tries softly.

“Meaning… you’re ….” Justin nods along, but he’s afraid to say the word.
“Pregnant.” Tyler breathes out the word in a tiny voice as if she’s been holding it for weeks.
“O-o-o-o…” Justin manages to say, his mind going completely blank.

“Is that good or bad?” Tyler asks.
“I’m not sure..” Justin answers out-of-breath, but then he balls his fists and the scream of joy comes from the tip of his toes. He jumps on the bed, hugs Tyler tightly, kisses her all over until she lets herself fall backwards, taking him with her.

“I love you. I love you so much.” Justin moans between two kisses.
“I love you too.” Tyler laughs and cries simultaneously. “I thought you’d be mad at me.”
“No. It just… it happened. And … this is amazing…. And…”
“Justin… I want to keep this quiet for a while longer. It’s still so early and …”

“… I know, I already lost a child with Rebecca…. We’ll wait… I’ll keep my mouth shut.”
“’Cause if your family finds out…”
“They’ll go crazy, I know….” Justin’s eyes fill with tears. “I think you just that made me the happiest dad-to-be….” He laughs and he kisses her again.

*****

When Kevin finally enters his house it’s already dark in the house, except for the kitchen and in Mateo’s room. He takes a deep breath, knowing he’ll either have to face an angry Scotty or a compassionate Jordan and he doesn’t know which is worse. He opens the door to the kitchen and he’s face to face with Scotty.

For just a moment they only stare at each other, neither able to say the first word, then Kevin’s shoulders sink and he whispers:
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…” Scotty is with Kevin in two steps and wraps his arms around his husband.
“I shouldn’t have gone to your family, but I was desperate.”

“I’m trying so hard..”
“I know, babe, too hard.”
“I’m sorry about what I said, I had no right to bring up the cheating again.”

“It hurt.” Scotty admits. “but at least now I know where it came from and .. I love you….” He kisses Kevin on the lips. A warm and tender kiss that Kevin breaks with regret.
“I’m exhausted.” He says, visibly tired.

“I know you are… Come to bed with me…” Scotty begs. Thinking that Scotty expects him to somehow ‘make up’ for the fight they had earlier, he tries to break free from Scotty’s hold, but Scotty doesn’t let him go. “Shhh, baby, all I want you to do is lie in my arms and let me listen to you breathe while you sleep…” Scotty adds.

Kevin no longer tries to break free. Instead he wraps his arms tighter around Scotty and he lets his head rest against Scotty’s shoulder. Scotty holds him for a while, but then he lets go.
“Go upstairs and change. I’ll make you some warm milk with honey.”

Kevin nods and goes upstairs, stopping in at Mateo’s room to say goodnight. He checks on Olivia who’s in a deep sleep, one arm hanging down, the other choking her pillow. He smiles. And he goes to Elizabeth’s room. She moans softly when he enters and wakes up a bit. She smiles when she sees him, turns over and goes right back to sleep.

Daniel’s is surrounded by his toys, so Kevin clears away some things before going to his bedroom where Billy sleeps in his little bed. Right after Tommy’s death, it had disorientated Billy to sleep in another room and he seemed to miss his father, but now, thankfully, he was back to sleeping through the nights.

Scotty enters and hands Kevin his drink.
“You checked on the kids, didn’t you?”
“Yes.” Kevin answers and Scotty undresses himself, every now and then he checks to see if Kevin finishes his drink.

Soon enough, Kevin is in Scotty’s arms and Scotty gently caresses Kevin’s face. He lets his fingertips gently slide close to Kevin’s eyes, forcing Kevin to close his eyes. And after each time it gets more difficult for Kevin to open them again.
“I have something to tell you…” Scotty speaks in a low voice to not wake up Kevin too much. Kevin tries to keep his eyes open, but Scotty can see him fighting the sleep that overwhelms him.

“We’re going away this weekend, just you and me. We leave Friday-morning and we come back Sunday-afternoon…. Everything is arranged. Mateo will stay with the Lockharts, so he can be with his sister. Daniel will stay with Kitty, she’ll take the him and Evan to the zoo. Olivia will stay with Sarah, because Paige and Olivia want to go shopping together and Nora will take care of Billy and Elizabeth…

Saul will be looking after Café 429. If anything shocking happens at Carter and Walker, Browne will take care of it with Lena. For once, Justin will not be working on a Saturday so he can be with Tyler all day for a change. And we, that’s you and me, will have nothing, absolutely nothing to worry about….”

Kevin tries to open his eyes, it’s not entirely working out, and so he just smiles.
“Sounds perfect….” He mumbles and he lies closer to Scotty, before he reaches out to the light-switch and turns off the light. Scotty smiles lovingly when his chest comes in touch with Kevin’s back. He wraps his arm around Kevin and closes his eyes.

*****

End of part 3/8

**** COMMERCIAL BREAK****

 
Comments 
29th-Apr-2013 02:10 am (UTC)
Yeah - Justin's gonna be a dad!! You have had him grow up so much. He'll do great.

Poor Julia. “Would you still be my friend if I was really losing my mind…?” How scary to be aware of yourself slipping out of reality.

"And we, that’s you and me, will have nothing, absolutely nothing to worry about….” Do I dare believe that???

30th-Apr-2013 09:26 pm (UTC)
I had wanted to see Justin as a dad (sigh) and I think that Julia acknowledging her problem helps her to get back on the right track.

29th-Apr-2013 07:43 am (UTC)
More Kevin-Juia talk..So poignant.I haven't liked Julia for some time.May be it is time to forgive her.Yippee!!!..Justin is going to be a dad.And am glad the air is cleared between K/S.
30th-Apr-2013 09:29 pm (UTC)
I couldn't let K/S remain angry at each other. The moment that Justin told Scotty what Kevin's problem was, he knew what to do. :)
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