About: Justin/Jordan, Kevin/Chad, Kevin/Kitty, Chad/Jason
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything, no, really I don't
Extra: This an AU (Alternative Universe) story, so remember : The more things change, the more they stay the same. Here are part 01, part 02, part 03, part 04, part 05, part 06, part 07, part 08, part 09, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13, part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18, part 19, part 20, part 21, part 22, part 23, part 24, part 25, part 26, part 27, part 28, part 29, part 30, part 31, part 32, part 33, part 34, part 35, part 36, part 37, part 38, part 39, part 40, part 41, part 42, part 43, part 44, part 45, part 46, part 47, part 48, part 49, part 50, part 51, part 52, part 53, part 54, part 55, part 56, part 57, part 58, part 59, part 60, part 61, part 62, part 63, part 64, part 65, part 66, part 67, part 68. part 69, part 70, part 71, part 72, part 73 and part 74
HALFWAY APRIL 2008 – FRIDAY NIGHT
Justin and Jordan had planned to spend the evening on the couch, with Kevin and Scotty, bitching about Kitty, but now that Jason got publicly outed, the boys are no longer in the mood to have fun, so they split up again, leaving Scotty and Kevin to enjoy their evening together.
“In a way, I’m glad we’re back home.” Jordan says, as he drops his key in the ashtray.
“Oh? Why?” Justin asks.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you something for a few days now, but with the death of your father and his funeral… It was never the right moment.”
“What’s going on?” Justin asks.
“Justin? Did something .. happen.. between us last Saturday-night?”
“Like what?” Justin tries not to sound too shaken.
“Please, don’t get mad,… but I could have sworn that you kissed me that night?’’
Justin remains quiet, playing with his keys. This is it. Jordan is confronting him now…
“I did.” Justin eventually replies and he sees that his answer confuses Jordan.
“I thought that you would deny it.”
“I won’t. I did it. I… I kissed you…”
“Why? You’re not gay. You want girls.”
“I don’t know, Jordan. One moment I planned to leave your room, the next my lips were on yours. I didn’t plan it…. It just happened… I … I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“I’m not offended… maybe surprised. And I don’t understand why you did it.”
“Neither do I.” Justin admits. “I’m as surprised as you are.”
Jordan sits down next to him on the couch.
“Are you attracted to me?” Jordan now asks.
“I don’t know.”
“It’s either yes or no, Justin.”
“I feel comfortable when I’m with you, yes. I like being with you. But ‘attracted to’? I don’t know, that would be a bit much perhaps and yet…. I didn’t dislike kissing you.”
“I like a decisive answer.” Jordan replies sarcastically/
“I’m sorry. I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”
“Can’t we simply pretend it didn’t happen? You were drunk…” Justin starts to sum up.
“You weren’t.” Jordan immediately reminds him. “...I’m not sure I can.”
“Going on about it, will only make us feel more uncomfortable.” Justin tries.
“I don’t think that ignoring it will help. And I’m not ‘going on’ about it. This is the first time we talk about it.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry. You have every right to an explanation, but I don’t have one.”
Justin remains quiet for a few moments and then he continues. “I haven’t been analyzing it. I’ve tried not to think about it. To be honest, I hoped you wouldn’t even remember it…”
“Well, I did.” Jordan bites his lip, but then he has to ask the question on his mind. “Do you fear that you’re gay? Bi-sexual?”
“I’ve never been attracted to a man. Not sexually… I grew up with Kevin as my closest sibling, his interest was always with men. I think I may look at man differently because I somehow still check out if a guy might potentially interesting for Kevin. I never looked at a man as being interesting for me.”
“And you think I would be interesting for Kevin.” Jordan asks jokingly.
“No, you’re not his type.” Justin answers immediately, before realizing that Jordan is joking.
“Thank God. He’s not my type either.” Jordan sighs relieved. “But it does leave me to question, where I fit in, in all this.”
“You were going on and on about Jason and Chad not being interested in you and I don’t get why it should worry you so much. If they can’t see what a great guy you are, then they aren’t worth crying over. But you looked so in need for affection, for someone to like you…”
“You felt sorry for me…” Jordan finishes the sentence, suddenly a bit angry, and he gets off the couch. “Thanks. Just what I need. The straight friend who feels sorry for the gay guy who can’t get a date.” Jordan walks into the direction of his room, but before he can reach the door, Justin is beside him, forcing him to turn around and look at him.
“I didn’t feel so sorry, alright? You were just so… handsome.. lying there.” Justin throws out the words without even thinking about what he’s saying. “I suddenly wanted to protect you so badly. I wanted to take away your pain and I didn’t know how… and then I kissed you and you looked so happy…. I don’t feel sorry for you, I just wanted you stop hurting.”
Jordan looks at Justin and he knows that Justin is genuine in his feelings. It’s true that Justin can’t stand to see people in pain. It makes sense. Justin is straight, he always was, he’ll continue to be so. So, it has to make sense, because there’s just no other option possible.
Jordan’s hand caresses Justin’s cheek. The little tenderness makes Justin shiver. His eyes close and his lips part and for one moment Jordan is tempted to kiss Justin, but he controls himself. It would only complicate matters and potentially ruin a good friendship and that is something Jordan is not willing to sacrifice. He forces himself to a joke.
“You’re so gay sometimes.” Jordan rolls his eyes and Justin’s smile is as fake as Jordan’s is. “So, we’re just friends…? Nothing more?”
“Just friends.” Justin replies, wondering if he sounds as hypocritical to Jordan as he does to himself.
“You know what? I think I’ll better get some sleep.”
“Yeah, me too. Goodnight.” Justin says, glad for some room to breathe. Jordan turns away from Justin and he enters his room, but once the door is closed he lets himself drop on his bed, feeling miserable and sad.
Justin closes the door of his own room and leans against it. He sinks to the ground and runs his hands through his hair, feeling confused and empty, at the same time very aroused. He then wipes his face with both hands and whispers.
“Man, I need to have sex… Soon!”
“Oh, hang on, Kev, there’s another call for me, …. it’s Jason.” Chad says.
“Call me back then?”
“No, just give me a sec…..” The line is quiet for a while, then. “Kev, I’m back… Jason talked to Robert… Robert kicked him out of the house…. I told Jase to come to my place.”
“I’m sorry, Chad. I had this hope, against better knowledge, that McCallister would support Jason.”
“I have to take care Jason right now. I’ll call you tomorrow?”
"Tell Jason I'm sorry about my sister being.... Kitty. I never wanted him to get hurt by our family.... Talk to you tomorrow?"
“Kit? Want the latest on the Jason McCallister debacle?”
“I’m listening, Kev.”
“I just heard from Chad. Robert kicked Jason out of his house. He turned his back on him.”
“Oh, God. Now I feel really bad for outing Jason. I never meant to hurt him…”
“I know, Kitty. Just know that this is not the end. McCallister will most likely try to get his revenge on you. Be careful, sis.”
“Don’t worry, Kevin, I’m not afraid of the Cosa McCallister.”
“Love you, bye.” Kevin laughs.
Kitty places her phone on the table and feels in desperate need of a shower. Thinking that the nice hot flow of water will certainly help her to relax, she undresses and enters the bathroom, just as her phone starts ringing. Once, twice, after the third time the answering machine kicks in and after the beep a message is left behind.
“Miss Walker, this is Robert McCallister… I’ve had a conversation with my brother and he has convinced me not to take you to court. He and I would however appreciate it, if in the future you would refrain from repeating your accusations at my brother’s address. Thank you.”
All Chad can do, is hold Jason tightly.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know where else to go.” Jason says, his voice muffled because his mouth is still in Chad’s t-shirt. Chad caresses Jason’s hair.
“That is alright, just know that the gossip-journalists will have a field-day with this.”
“I’m sorry.” Jason says again.
“Nah, don’t be silly. It’s been ages since I was on the cover of the National Enquirer or one of those other rags.” Chad jokes.
“I’ve never been on one.” Jason says.
“No? Well, there’s an upside to this then: That is one thing you can strike of you list of ‘things to do before I’m dead’.” Chad’s words put a little smile on Jason’s face. “Jason, I’m sorry.” Chad then says.
“For kissing you at William’s funeral … You were right. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Chad? Can we go to bed?”
“Tired, huh? Want to get some sleep?”
“No… I want you to make to love to me, without holding back. There are finally no more secrets to keep.”
On Jason’s phone there is one message, at 0.47 am: “Jason? It’s me, Robert. If you get this message… Call me?”
END OF PART 75