Behind the mask 27/?By Marea67About:
Kevin/Scotty and others.Rate:
When Scotty has to deal with too many disasters at once, William offers him a solution that will change his life
“Scotty, we need to talk. Seriously. We need
to talk.” Kevin insists and Scotty knows everything is over.
“I agree…. Let’s get this over with.” Scotty replies defeated and he sits down in the chair opposite of the bed, so he can face Kevin. “Why are you here anyway, away from the party?” He asks, before Kevin can say something.
“I couldn’t stay there anymore. I felt like I was suffocating. I’m pretending that all is alright, but I know it’s not. I guess I’m done with all the make-belief and the lying and the trying to please others, when I know I should make some decisions and then be honest to those I love. Even if it means that I’m going to hurt them so much….”
Scotty is tense, all his muscles seem to lock themselves, ready for the blow that is about to strike him.
“ So, I… I have something to tell you…” Kevin starts. “I saw Jason before the party started. I saw him near the lake where we used to go to… Where I proposed to him…”
Through Scotty’s eyes, the room seems to swim. He’s not sure he’s ready for this. He doesn’t want to know or hear it, but after a small hesitation, Kevin goes on plunging the knife into Scotty’s heart.
“I’m sorry. So sorry. He kissed me…. I let
him kiss me.” Kevin confesses.
Scotty trembles with the desire to run away and just never come back, but he can’t move a muscle. To his horror, Kevin leaves the place on the bed, where he had been sitting and he kneels in front of Scotty.
“Scotty, I’m so sorry. Can you forgive me?”
“F.. Forgive you?” Scotty’s voice trembles. He’s unable to understand why Kevin just doesn’t get it over with. “I knew you still had feelings for Jason. I guess, it’s only natural, that you want him back.” Scotty tries to sound reasonable. He tries so hard, but it hurts too much. His eyes fill with tears.
“Oh, but I don’t. I don’t want him back.” Kevin says as if it’s the most logical thing in the world.
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. He and I, we met again. And for a moment it seemed as if what we had was still there. The love we used to feel, the intimacy we had created, a time of beautiful summer-days and sailboats and engagement-rings and there was the belief that this feeling that ‘forever happy’ was possible and in our grasp. But … they were nothing but memories. Beautiful
memories, but just memories nonetheless.
When he kissed me, it didn’t feel the same anymore. I didn’t feel for him what I used to feel before. It was over. Done. Chapter closed. I’m so sorry, that I let it happen in the first place. I know, that I shouldn’t have done it. I should have told Jason to back off, but… I needed
If there was chance that I was in still in love with Jason, then I’d have to be honest with you and tell you all about it… I would have had to break up with you, because I don’t want to lie to you about anything. You are an amazing man and you deserve the very best. And I’m not always sure that I can give you what you deserve.
But if you can find it in your heart to forgive me, for letting Jason kiss me, I promise you that I’ll do everything in power to make you the happiest man alive.” There’s a desperation in Kevin’s eyes that Scotty doesn’t understand.
“But… I love you. I always have. If you need my forgiveness, you have it.” Scotty answers.
“Yes, of course.” Scotty is surprised that Kevin would think differently.
“What about Chad?”
“Chad?” Scotty asks.
“Yes. I saw you two talk briefly, almost secretive. Then you left the room. And then he left as well. You both went to the library, where he closed the door?” Now that Scotty’s eyes are drying up, he can see that Kevin has tears is his eyes. “I have to admit I had forgotten how attractive he was.
He’s more handsome than I am. He’s so much more charming and you were in love with him, before you fell in love with me? So, I could see and understand if you’d prefer him over me…” Kevin stammers. “Did the two of you…?” Kevin doesn’t even dare to ask the question. Scotty is flabbergasted.
“Did you seriously think I’d chose him
? Because you have a few more scars? No!... We talked. And he, too, took the initiative to kiss me
, but it was meaningless to me. I don’t know what changed, but I believe it’s… because I’m totally in love with you.”
“I thought you’d prefer Chad.”
“I thought you wanted Jason.” Scotty laughs through his tears. “I was terrified that you wanted tell me, that you were going to break up with me….” Kevin caresses Scotty’s face.
“Since I’m on my knees anyway… Do you still want to marry me?”
“Oh, yes! Yes! I do. I haven’t changed my mind.” Scotty is suddenly cheerful, now a huge weight has fallen off his shoulders.
“When?” Kevin asks.
“Right now!” Scotty insists.
“Not even my mom call pull that off.” Kevin jokes.
“As soon as possible! …. And we will go back to Wales, right? I mean, it’s not like your want to stay here?” Scotty hopes that Kevin doesn’t want to stay in London, he has fallen in love with the house, the land and the people. And the tower-room.
“No. I thought you might want to stay. So much more to do. You’re still young and …”
“Shhh, I’d rather be there with you. Come here…..” Scotty pulls Kevin into his arms to kiss him, but the first kiss leads to a second and a third. Scotty feels Kevin’s warm hands on his back, pulling him off the chair.
They fall to the ground, Scotty covering Kevin, his body moves against Kevin’s.
“We can’t do this. We have guests…” Scotty points out.
“Too bad….” Kevin laughs and he pushes Scotty back down to him. Scotty moans and his fingers open the first buttons on Kevin’s shirt, so he can kiss Kevin’s throat.
But just as Kevin is about to beg him to move even lower, Scotty raises his head.
“Wait… You bought Jason an engagement-ring?” He suddenly asks.
“Huh?” Kevin blinks a few times, before he understands Scotty’s question. “Yes. In a red velvet box. Silver. The ring was made of silver. Jason doesn’t like gold.”
“I don’t have a ring.” Scotty suddenly pouts playfully.
“You have my heart.” Kevin answers with a soft and romantic smile.
“Really? So, you’re exclusively mine?”
“I’m all yours… Will there be no else for you either?”
“No.” Scotty shakes his head. “I love you…”
“And I love you. And you know I really want to do right now?”
“I always want to have sex with you, no, I want to go downstairs and tell the whole world. Make it official.”
“Why don’t we?” Scotty gets on his knees. “Because as much as I want to make love with you, what I want even more is for everyone to see how happy I am with you.” Especially Jason and Chad
, but he doesn’t say it out loud.
“Especially Jason and Chad?” Kevin asks, raising an eyebrow.
Scotty looks annoyed for a second, but then he grins and he nods.
“Especially them…” He admits without shame and he helps Kevin off the floor. Both he and Kevin straighten their clothes to look a little decent again and not as if they just had a roll in the hay, even if they would have preferred that.
Kevin takes something out of a drawer, while Scotty makes sure that his sleeves are alright again.
“How do I look?” Scotty asks and he turns to Kevin, amused by the look of love he sees in Kevin’s eyes. Had he really
been worried about losing Kevin?
“You look amazing.” Kevin says, clearly in awe. “But there’s something that, I think, would make you look even better.”
“What?” Scotty stares at his image in the mirror, he can’t see anything wrong with his clothes. Kevin takes Scotty’s hand and makes him open it up, palm upward.
“This.” Kevin says and he places something on the palm of Scotty’s open hand.
“A blue box?” Scotty asks, not daring to believe that this is what he thinks it is.
“I like to not repeat myself. Open it.” Kevin encourages. Scotty is almost too afraid to do it, afraid that isn’t what he hoped for.
But it’s not cufflinks or something like that. Shining against a background of blue velvet are two golden rings.
“I hope you do
like gold?” Kevin suddenly wonders.
“I love these.” Scotty is clearly overwhelmed.
“I had them ordered and I had planned to have dad send them to me in Wales, but then all our plans changed and I asked Kitty yesterday to get them for me.”
“And she kept it a secret? For that long?” Scotty jokes. The Walker-kids are notorious about being unable to keep a secret.
“It’s been an entire day. I think the whole family knows about it by now.” Kevin sighs.
He takes the ring out of the box.
“I hope it fits…” He says, but it immediately slips around Scotty’s finger as it knows it had been created to be there.
“Oh, wow!” Scotty is speechless, but his trembling fingers manage to take the other ring out of the box.
Kevin holds up his hand and Scotty slips the ring on his finger. It fits again and they both smile.
“Let’s go down-stair and show off.” Scotty suggests, after placing a tender kiss on Kevin’s lips. Kevin takes Scotty’s hand and leads him out the door and down the stairs to tell his family and friends the official news of his engagement to Scotty.
END OF CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN