Kevin, Scotty, Chad, Jason Rate:
: B&S belongs to ABC Summary
: Remember how Chad proposed to Jason at the end of "Underneath the mistletoe"? Well, Chad and Jason have set the date for their wedding, but will things go as smoothly as Chad/Jason had hoped?
Scotty is surprised when he sees Jason and Chad standing at the door. They both look exhausted and Jason’s still swollen eyes prove that at least one of them has had a rough moment, but even Chad is oddly silent and not his usual cheerful self. When Kevin sees them, he puts Daniel in Olivia’s arms.
“Honey, why don’t you and Daniel go play in either his room or your own? I think uncle Jason and uncle Chad need to talk to us.” He says. Olivia gives him the wise look of a child who knows when she just needs to get out.
“Can I take some of Saul’s cupcakes with me?” Olivia asks innocently.
Jonathan and Saul have been quite successfully making delicious cupcakes since Sarah’s wedding and Olivia doesn’t mind trying them. Kevin gives Scotty a questioning look, wondering if it’s a good idea. Scotty nods that it’s alright.
“Good, but don’t eat too much!” Kevin warns.
“Won’t!” Olivia promises. She takes one for herself, one for Daniel, and let’s her hand hang over the bowl. “One for Zemulon?” She tries.
“Sorry, I told Zemulon he’s on a diet, he’s getting way too fat.” Kevin replies in all sincerity, though he takes away the bowl and gives Olivia a warning little look.
“Sorry, Zemulon, I tried.” Kevin can hear Olivia say as she takes Daniel to his room so they can play there.
“Kids! They keep trying.” Scotty laughs apologetic at Jason and Chad. “I think that asking if everything is alright would be a very stupid question. You both look like hell.”
Both Jason and Chad had wondered, on their way up, if they would be comfortable enough to speak to Kevin and Scotty, but when the coffee is on the table and the cup-cakes are divided and the first round of random topics and pleasant nothings have been discussed, Chad start to tell about how Jason had called him and then Jason tells his side of the story as well.
Sitting across from Scotty, Kevin often looks at his husband, wondering if he too can see how much the relationship between Chad and Jason has shifted once again. When Jason struggles with his emotions and tries not to cry all over again, Scotty discretely pushes the box of tissues in his direction so Jason can take one.
It earns him a little grin from both Chad and Kevin and Chad takes over the conversation and shifts the attention to himself once again, so Jason can compose himself. Halfway Chad’s explanation Scotty’s and Kevin’s eyes meet and they both smile, glad that their friends seem to have found a way back to each other.
“Wow, that’s quite some insight. A lot to deal with.” Scotty says.
“It is.” Jason admits.
“What will you guys do now? Is the wedding back on?”
“We don’t know yet.” Chad shrugs. Upon seeing the non-understanding looks on Kevin and Scotty, Chad sighs:
“Our break-up was kind of revealing. Turns out my mom wasn’t very happy with my choice….
“And it would seem the McCallisters weren’t happy with mine…” Jason shrugs.
“But that is only natural.” Kevin points out. “In times of crises the family bands together, or so they should. So, of course the McCallisters would be in your side, Jason, and I can’t think of anything else that your mother can do, but be on your side, Chad.”
“We thought about that as well.” Jason replies.
“But we both still feel that it was a shock to hear them speak like that… At this point I don’t want to throw a party when half the people on that party would rather not see us get married, even if they won't say it out loud.” Chad continues.
“Fair enough.” Scotty nods. “But you guys still want to get married, right?”
“Yeah, sure, in time. When we’re ready, when Jason has dealt with Robert’s death and when we feel that those other we love can support our love.” Chad answers and he sees disappointment in the faces of Kevin of Scotty. “Hey, no worries… We will
get married. I’m not letting him walk away from me again.” Chad grins.
“Actually, Kevin, I wanted to ask you a favor. Can you collect my things at Kitty’s and explain to her that I’m back with Chad? I think I would not be able to lie her and I don’t want to bring up the subject of Robert. She’s still very sensitive about talking about him and I think she still feels bad about the fact that she had the machines switched off.”
“I agree with you and I won’t say any of this to Kitty. She’ll be feeling guilty over Robert’s death all over again and I don’t want that either. It was all very painful, but it needed to be done.” Kevin says.
“Oh, I completely agree. It was better for Robert..” Jason laughs lovingly. “… but I miss him.”
“Me too.” Kevin says.
“Well, I hate to go, but I’m tired and I want to go home. Sure you want to come with me?” Chad asks Jason and he nods. “We’ll say goodbye to Olivia and Daniel first, if that is alright with you.”
“So, what do you think?” Scotty asks, when he finally sees Kevin, later that day. Kevin shrugs.
“I collected all of Jason’s things, explained to Kitty that Jason had had a rough night and that he had contacted Chad and that they had talked and that he would get in touch with her later, once he had gathered his thoughts somewhat better. She didn’t ask anything else. She took it well. I think she was glad to have her house back.”
“Did you tell her about Jason and how he misses Robert?”
“No… better not. Seth told me that Kitty is dealing more and more with Robert’s death.”
“Finally.” Scotty says softly and Kevin shrugs.
“Each in their own time.” He replies philosophically. “I brought everything to Chad’s place. I do hope that they can finally find some peace and get back to loving each other.”
“I hope so too.” Scotty says sweetly and he takes Kevin in his arm to kiss him, before Olivia comes back from the kitchen.
Jason’s back is pressed up against Chad’s chest and Chad holds him tightly in his arms. They were both exhausted, but where Jason just fell asleep the moment his head hit the pillow, Chad can’t seem to find some rest. He listens to Jason’s breathing, hoping it will relax him to sleep, but it’s no use.
Still, he doesn’t want to get up either. The mere thought that he would have to let go of Jason and leave this bed is just unacceptable, so he closes his eyes again, but in his mind he hears his mother’s voice telling him, once again, how she really felt about Jason. Chad opens his eyes again.
Of course, he knows, that Kevin is right. Family. They should be on your side first. But… Chad knows his mother. Her critique had been an honest one and it was directed at Jason. He hadn’t been surprised by Jason admission about his Uncle Jack. Chad had always suspected that Jack hadn’t liked him.
And then there was Donald. The closest thing to a father he had ever had. Yet, he would have fired Donald, if Jason hadn’t stopped him. Some people who had been uninvited had reacted with words that displayed their mistrust in the relationship between Jason and Chad. It is all so disappointing.
He had believed, perhaps naively, that the McCallisters would care more about Jason’s happiness and would be more supportive of them, but he also believed that from his own family, who are now remarkably quiet as well. And he wonders who he’s trying to impress with a great wedding-day. Jason? Himself? Others?
He turns to his back, but lets his hand rest on Jason’s body to not lose touch with him. Chad doesn’t believe the ceiling will provide him with an answer, yet he’ staring at it as if he expects one by miracle. In a way, he is now the one who’s looking at this wedding and seeing it as fake and superficial.
The McCallisters don’t care. Whatever is left of his own family isn’t particularly interested. Donald had been a jerk to Jason. And Chad actually no longer cares who will take the pictures of them or if his fans get inside scoops on their wedding-day. The only ones who had seemed genuinely concerned for Jason and Chad
, had been Kevin and Scotty.
Had there been some truth to Jason’s hesitations? Was it all worth it? Had it stopped being about them, and become more of the picture they presented, perhaps some feeling of being an example for others? And is an example really what he wants to be? He closes his eyes when he realizes that the answer to his last question is ‘no’.
END OF CHAPTER 12